Are there ANGELS?

✨ Some Angels Walk Beside Us First ✨

Every Christmas, my mom plays the black-and-white version of It’s a Wonderful Life. I’ve probably watched it 30 times by now. For most of my life, I saw it as a sweet, vintage story about an angel showing George Bailey the value of his life — a feel-good holiday tradition. But I never truly understood the heart of that message… until I lost Niall.

This week marks seven years since Niall passed. Seven. Isn’t that wild? I can’t believe it’s been that long. Sometimes it feels like it just happened, and other times it feels like it was another lifetime. What’s strange is how life just… moves along. We keep working, traveling, loving, growing — and then dates like this come around, and we’re pulled right back into the memory. Into the loss. Into the love. Every year, this week hits me hard. Not in a dramatic way, but in a quiet, soul-deep kind of ache. It never really goes away. And I’ve realized that for me, it’s not just these anniversaries when I think of Niall. It’s every time a little silver lining appears in my life. A moment of peace. A stroke of luck. A “how did that just fall into place?” kind of moment. I always smile, pause, and think — that was Niall. That was my angels.

Niall was the first friend I made when I moved to New York City. We met at the pub where we both worked, and our friendship formed fast. It wasn’t loud or flashy — it was solid, grounding, and full of mutual care. He looked out for me in ways I didn’t even realize at the time. He was always ahead, quietly making sure I was okay, steering me back on track if I was slipping.

Looking back now, I see it for what it was: Niall was my living angel. He came into my life for a purpose, and maybe that purpose wasn’t meant to last a lifetime — but it changed mine forever. I believe he was sent to me, just like I believe he was sent to protect others too — his family, his friends, everyone lucky enough to feel his light. And when his time came, I believe his work here was done. I’ve lost other people who have shaped me — my grandparents, my brother — and I believe they’re my angels now too. But Niall? He felt like my person. Like he was sent specifically for me. To get me through that chapter of my life, to help me believe in myself, and to show me the kind of love that doesn’t ask for anything in return.

Grief never really fades. It just folds into who you are. It becomes a quiet part of your daily rhythm. But every so often, like on weeks like this, it rises up and reminds you just how deep that bond was. And for me, it reminds me that we never really lose the people we love — they stay with us, woven into the good things that happen. The gentle pushes forward. The unexpected blessings. The small signs that say, I’m still here.

Seven years later, it still amazes me how deeply I feel Niall’s presence. Some people come into our lives and quietly change us forever — not through grand gestures, but through steady love, protection, and unwavering friendship. Niall was that for me. He had this calm way of showing up exactly when I needed support, without ever being asked. He listened without judgment, gave without condition, and reminded me of who I was when I forgot. He was a grounding force in my life, someone whose presence made me feel safe. I know now that he was meant to walk alongside me for a time, and though he's gone, the imprint he left on my heart is something I will carry with me always.

So today, I’m not just remembering Niall with sadness. I’m remembering him with awe and gratitude. I know he’s out there, watching me and others he loved, probably laughing at us, and gently guiding us along the way. I know he’s proud of me. And if you’ve ever lost someone and felt that unexplainable “presence” when something beautiful happens — that whisper, that nudge, that silver lining — maybe that’s your angel too.

✨ You’re never too lost for your angels to find you. ✨

MUCH LOVE

XOXO