Life as we know it is extremely hard, the everyday stress, different life changes, the unknowns. We all have a different journey. I know I preach to pay it forward and help others and treat people kindly, which you all should, but there needs to be moments where you are kind to yourself. Take time to acknowledge the hard work you are doing. Acknowledge how you are treating people and give yourself gratitude. We are our own worst critics and if we let the negative thoughts take a hold of us we will put so much pressure on ourselves to which we stress out, have anxiety, and get depressed. When times are difficult, seeking comfort in our unconditional goodwill towards ourselves could become a lifeline for our well-being.
“to love oneself, is the beginning of a life-long romance”
- Oscar Wilde
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I feel we have been told from a young age how to act and having self-love wasn’t one of the things that many grew up with. Society tells us we need to be a certain way and a lot of people strive for that, but I want you all to stop and look in the mirror and just say thank you with a kind voice. Say thank you for doing your best, thank you for the life you have been given, thank you for the bad moments and thank you for the good moments, and for the people that care about you. Like I said we put a lot of pressure on ourselves, work, relationships, friends, family issues whatever it may be. I know for myself I have always been that person that wears my heart on my sleeve and still am. I will always put people I love before my needs, I always make sure everyone is ok. It is a curse and a blessing all at the same time. I know a lot of people like this and it can cause extreme stress because we forget to be kind to ourselves. We forget to do things for ourselves because we want to make everyone else happy. We lose ourselves in that, and then for some it can spiral out of control and they can’t snap out of it. There are many other scenarios not just mine. When we lose ourselves and don’t give gratitude and kindness for doing our best our minds shut down and the ego takes over. I have seen so many loved ones go through depression and to me it is the saddest thing. To not be able to help someone I love breaks my heart. They can’t just snap out of it, they don’t know how to be kind to themselves as they think they don’t deserve that. This is why I say and ask to take those few minutes every day in the morning or at night and just thank yourself, tell yourself you are doing your best and be kind about it. It is such a little thing that with practice will make a difference. Comfort yourself, it is hard to look forward to each day when you know you could experience a situation of pain and sadness. So, each day decide to have something to look forward to no matter how small it is. Life is hard, people will say things about you, people will judge you, people will hurt you, work can be stressful, family can be stressful…. there will be so many different scenarios that happen to you. But know when you are in that situation be kind to yourself and know that you are doing your best and trying your hardest. (If you are). Darkness is a tough place to be in, and shining light on that is what needs to be done. *There will be times when things seem really difficult and nothing is going to change; that you won’t be able to move on. You need a catalyst; something that will bring about a change. The catalyst is hope. Hope is an inherent aspect of kindness; hope encourages you to believe that things will eventually improve and you will feel better.* If you read that and think to yourself… “Amanda, it is not that easy”. How about if you are feeling down just visualize something that makes you happy or imagine yourself in a beautiful garden of your favorite colors. If you create a place of happiness in your mind the happiness will follow. Be open to new ideas, maybe you need to tweak or change something to be more self-compassionate. Be kind about the change. One of my previous blogs is about change which I feel a lot of people are scared of and that is ok. I see change as just upgrading your tools in your tool shed. You don’t have to change as a person, just make some adjustments in your journey. You want to be able to go down the path of happiness and enlightenment so you need to make the tweaks throughout life to stay on that path, otherwise you will just stand there looking at two paths… one you want and one that is not good for you. The ego and negative thoughts will pull you towards the bad path because it is easier. The path you want and need takes work and most have a tough time with that. Which is why gratitude, kindness, compassion, empathy can be some of those tools you need to keep shining bright on the path that is meant for you. When you shine bright it will be much easier to go down the beautiful path you are destined for. Have patience though, this will not happen in the next 20 minutes, it can take years, but know it will be ok. Be the light that shines so bright that no one can take it away from you. Don’t’ let your ego take a hold of you mind. I preach and preach about we only get one journey here and we really need to make it the best! Yes, life will challenge you along the way, but you all are strong enough to handle what it throws at you. BE the best, BE the brightest, BE the love, BE the compassion, BE the empathic! BE strong, BE kind to yourself!
MUCH LOVE, XOXO
-snips from Welldoing.org very helpful information